So, I started this post talking about Lent, which I really know nothing about, other than that it is 40 days of deprivation. I had hit a bit of a wall, wondering what to type next (hard to expound on something you know nothing about), when, my computer went "boop". I looked, and had a message from my little sister on gtalk.
Mar: yo, this is my encouragement to u today:
For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.
It stopped me in my tracks. God grabbed my heart and squeezed it, overwhelming me with His grace and mercy. He is calling me to change, calling me to become more like Him, and I AM SO LAZY. And, as odd as it may come across, I get so discouraged by my own choices to sin. Like I'll never be able to do it - to change. I, such a wretch, am so utterly undeserving of His mercy or time of day. But.
For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.
How can I deny it? How can I doubt His care and love and desire for me? When He interrupts me from my totally pointless rambling to just tell me that He IS doing what I ask of Him, changing me. That there is hope that I can do what He wants me to do. Indeed, that, despite my sluggardliness, my stubborness, and my rebellion, He is giving me not only the know-how and skills to do what He wants - but He is giving me the very DESIRE to do so. Even if I don't see it. What mercy. And what hope.
It welled up tears in me. Just His love. His care. For me. What a God we serve.
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